THE METTA WAY

People feeling stuck in a repeating cycle of physical, material or psychological ill health have benefitted from Family Constellations Therapy. Those experiencing chronic pain/illness/fatigue, inexplicable anxiety and fear, a sense of being lost/directionless, long term grief, a lack of joy, failed relationships, addictions and financial difficulties have seen changes after doing this work. Those with a diagnosis of PCOD, depression, bipolarity, fibromyalgia, addictions, trauma and many other physical/psychological health issues have also experienced ease, relief and transformation through Family Constellations Therapy. I believe that anyone can do this work as long as they are able to be present for a session. I work with adults and young people between the ages of 13 - 18 in this method. Please get in touch to explore possibilities.

The family does not need to come in for sessions. I work with individuals in an individual session. Couples come in for a session just by themselves or may choose to attend a group session. You are welcome to attend a group session by yourself or with other members of your family. Even in a group session, I will work with one person at a time.

There are many forms of therapy available today and any might work for you. The only way to know if FC is the right kind of therapy for you is to come in for a session and experience it. I offer individual and group sessions of this work. Group sessions contain brief explanations of the core principles of the work and allow for people to participate as witnesses. This is an option for people to see how the work is done and make an informed choice. You may also get in touch and I will answer your queries.

Individual and couples' sessions are between 60 - 100 minutes long. I offer group sessions in a programme called 'The Heart Of It'. Each group session is usually about 4 hours long, usually on weekends and available in a series of 4 or 2 consecutive sessions. Therapeutic community sessions are offered in a programme called Muster. These sessions are also on weekends and are usually about 2 hours long.

The pandemic has affected all our financial fortunes and I offer different options for payment as per the requirements of client-seekers. Please get in touch to discuss what may be right for you.

You are welcome to do as many sessions as you would like, as often as you would like. However, it is advisable to keep a minimum interval of at least a week/10 days between sessions. This allows for the work to take effect and be assimilated in the individual and the system.

As a facilitator of FC, I will ‘open’ a constellation for a client-seeker in a group or an individual session. In a group session, I will ask the client-seeker a few questions to gather basic information about the issue, their family and the outcome they wish for. The client-seeker is then asked to pick representatives for what they want/ for members of their family and arrange them in space according to an internal image they may have of these relationships. When set in spatial relation to each other, representatives are able to tap into the energy field of the client-seeker’s system and feel, sense and move because of this energy. This is phenomenology at work - the lived experience of a representative in the energy field. As a facilitator, I am informed by the energy field, the representative experience and the facts from the client-seeker in moving toward a resolution to the issue at hand. In an individual/couples' session the same method is followed. However, figures and objects are used as representatives and I will draw from the energy of the field and the responses of client-seeker/s to the figures to move to a resolution.

Family Constellations work has evolved to be an amalgamation of different modalities of psychotherapy, philosophy, the neuroscience of trauma and spirituality. The work is alsophenomenological, i.e., based on the lived experience of humans. Hellinger describes the Orders of Love and the Consciences as the foundations of this method of therapy. They determine how family systems organize themselves. The three Orders of Love guide our relationships in our families: Belonging – This principle is about the human need for connection and belonging. All members of a family system have an equal right to belong. All parts of an indivuidual have an equal place in the quest for wholeness, authenticity and integrity. Balance – This principle is about the human need for equilibrium. All family systems involve giving and taking/receiving of love and resources. Equilibrium is maintained when those who give and those who take do so within their capacity. Precedence – This principle is about the human need for order and occupying the right place in our family systems. Those who come first precede those who come after. This Order ensures harmony and balance in a family system. Three Consciences guide an individual in fulfilling these needs: The Personal Conscience helps a person decide on what is right or wrong for them. It helps them make choices in their lives. The Group Conscience is impersonal and amoral. It guides the whole system towards balance at all times. The Spiritual Conscience takes us beyond our personal and group affiliations. Spiritual Conscience is what moves through us when we experience a deep sense of unity with our origins, who we are and as a consequence, the world. It is a deep, soulful acceptance of all that is.

Rupert Sheldrake, a biologist, researcher and author, offers an explanation for the energy field of a family system that constellations work allows us to tap into. He calls this energy field the morphogenetic field. The morphogenetic field has its origins in developmental biology and explains how cells of an organism respond to biochemical signals and develop into specific organs that perform specific functions in the organism. Sheldrake observed that the morphogenetic field has inbuilt memory in his hypothesis of morphic resonance. In a social group like a family, this results in the repetition of particular patterns, established in the past, across generations. Hellinger discovered that constellations can tap into this energy field and reveal hidden patterns in a family system.